I Woke Up One Morning (BBC) 1985-1986

I Woke Up One Morning

When Carla Lane puts pen to paper and writes a sitcom, you can be assured that...
(A) It won't be very funny!
(B) It will be repetitive.
(C) It will include her fucking stupid views on animal rights, and vegetarianism!
Basically she could write a series about a man who talks to ducks and the dopey liberals at the BBC would buy into it!
The series, which was stretched out into 2 seasons, centres on four pissheads who are sent to a psychiatric hospital to dry out (the series was filmed at Hellingly Hospital in Sussex).
Carla employs her usual favourite's from previous sitcoms to play the leads, including Robert Gillespie as Zero, Michael Angelis as Max (playing his same-as-always deadpan philosophical type) and Jean (Ma Boswell) Boht. The other 2 dipso's are called Danny and Derek.
There isn't much you can say about either series, they were both exactly the same! Episode 1, the drunks get dropped off at the hospital, Episodes 2-5 they all talk about their lives, wives, kids and being drunks! Episode 6 They all get pissed!...and that is the format of both seasons!
Although it is supposed to be a comedy, I never laughed ONCE, however I did find it amusing  as my dad was an annoying drunk and I could relate to some of the bullshit that the characters spoke!

Rentaghost (BBC 1) 1976-1984

Rentaghost

Rentaghost was childrens TV at its very best, it was camp, anarchic and totally stupid!
I was there when the first episode was broadcast on the 1st June 1976, and 8 years later to tune into the final show!
I was really into ghosts about that time and after watching the first show I went out and purchased the Rentaghost book by Bob Block. I idolised the characters and never missed one episode!
The first show introduces Fred Mumford, a slightly porky middle aged loser, recently deceased, who has decided to start an agency for ghosts who were also failures in life. His first signing is a medieval jester called Timothy Claypole (who is wonderfully played by the incredibly gay Michael Staniforth) and shortly afterwards a priggish Victorian ghost, Hubert Davenport (Michael Darbyshire). Mumford and the ghosts operate from an office which is owned by Harold Meeker (who ends up in hospital in episode 3 after he discovers his tenants are ghosts!)
The first series is slapstick based comedy, which looks quite dated to 21st century eyes, but this method was phased out in subsequent seasons and replaced by farce.
Season 1 also features Ethel Meeker, Harold's loopy wife, and Fred's parents who persistently cold call the office seeking him, (unaware that he is dead).
Elderly Scottish spook Hazel the McWitch,  and entrepreneur Adam Painting (Christopher Biggins) make their debut in season 4, and Dobbin, the pantomime horse joins the cast in the Rentasanta Christmas special of December 1978, after being brought to life by Claypole's spell.
Before the fifth season began shooting, Michael Darbyshire, who played Davenport, died, and Anthony Jackson (Fred Mumford) declined to return. This left Michael Staniforth (Claypole) as the only original ghost. I remember being pretty upset about this at the time!
The later episodes were set in the Meeker household after Claypole, Dobbin, McWitch, Nadia Popov, and a collection of other spooks move in and create weekly havoc, much to the annoyance of Arthur and Rose Perkins, the Meeker's, long suffering next door neighbours!
The 1982 Christmas special saw the ghosts act out a pantomime in which Ethel Meeker sings 'Tangerine' while a roller disco takes place around her! This episode is also my personal favorite!
The final episodes introduce Whatsisname Smith (Kenneth Connor), Susie Starlight, Rover the tortoise and Jeremy (a robotic cleaning machine).
Tragically all of the original cast are now ghosts themselves, Davenport, Mumford, Harold Meeker and Claypole, have all joined the spirit world for real! Davenport (Michael Darbyshire) died in 1979, Michael Staniforth who played Claypole died of AIDS in 1987 and Anthony Jackson (Mumford) died in 2006. I remember meeting Jackson at Eastbourne station a couple of weeks before he died, I told him that I was a big fan of the show, but accidentally addressed him as  Mr Meeker!, he quickly corrected me by replying in a hushed voice "I was Mumford actually", He looked a bit hurt to be remembered from Rentaghost (no doubt bitterness must of crept into his thoughts for resigning from the show and missing out on 5 years guaranteed work!) As I watched him shuffle (rather dejectedly) onto the 1431 to Victoria, I felt a sadness that the show would never come back!
Rentaghost did return in 2006 as an unsuccessful stage production, without any of the original cast (obviously!) and written by that talentless cunt, Joe Pasquale!
There are also plans to make a Hollywood movie version starring Ben Stiller, but this would be a disaster..as we all know what happens when the Yanks get their hands on something good!
I'm afraid most of us who remember the series would never settle for anything less than the original cast, and as 80% of them are now dead, we can forget it!
Season 1 is available on DVD, but many of the other episodes were destroyed by the BBC (who also famously did the same with many historic Dr Who episodes!)

The Cast

• Timothy Claypole (Michael Staniforth)  (1976-1984) *
• Harold Meaker (Edward Brayshaw)  (1976-1984) *
• Ethel Meaker (Ann Emery)  (1976-1984)
• Fred Mumford (Anthony Jackson)  (1976–1978) *
• Hubert Davenport (Michael Darbyshire) (1976–1978) *
• Hazel the McWitch (Molly Weir)  (1978–1984) *
• Nadia Popov (Sue Nicholls)  (1981–1984)
• Adam Painting (Christopher Biggins)  (1977-1983)
• Rose Perkins (Hal Dyer)  (1978–1984) *
• Arthur Perkins (Jeffrey Segal)  (1978–1984)
• Tamara Novek (Lynda La Plante)  (1980) 
• Dobbin the Pantomime Horse (William Perrie, John Asquith) 
• Mrs Mumford (Betty Alberge)  (1976–1978) *
• Mr Mumford (John Dawson)  (1976–1978)
• Whatsisname Smith (Kenneth Connor)  (1983-1984) *
• Susie Starlight (Aimi MacDonald) (1984)

* These actors are now real GHOSTS!

Barriers (ITV - Tyne Tees) (1981-82)

Barriers

Rather a downbeat kind of series, I remember it being shown on a Sunday afternoon about 4pm (ish), this is probably why no one remembers it!
The series starts with solicitor Vince Whitaker (Paul Rogers), informing public schoolboy, Billy Stanyon (Benedict Taylor) of the death of his parents in a sailing accident. This incident leads to the revelation that Billy was adopted. Whitaker tries to help Billy locate his real parents and they set out on a journey to solve the mystery. After following a trail of false starts, dead ends and cryptic clues that takes them across Europe, Billy eventually finds out his real parents were killed in a border skirmish on the Austrian / Hungarian border in 1963. He also establishes the identity of the man who drove the car in which they died, Konrad Spetz. Spetz admits the true story to Billy who ends up feeling that the man is the closest link to his real family and although he hates him, also wants to remain close and spend more time with him. Spetz is wanted by police for a string of deceptions and crimes, including murder. Spetz tries to escape as the net closes and Billy follows pleading with Spetz to stay, but he will not listen and accidentally falls to his death on the Alps, as Billy desperately tries to hold his arm . Billy meets Whitaker at the base of the mountain, dejected, and declares "It's over, it's all over".

Spetz admits everything to Billy

After viewing, you can't help but wonder how a pissy regional network like Tyne Tees managed to come up with such a deep, meaningful and well acted series. I have never seen it repeated since the original broadcasts, which is a shame, as it was intended as a family show (albeit a rather gloomy one!). The quality of the filming leaves much to be desired, an unforgivable crime, because many of the locations are quite breathtaking, but I suppose Tyne Tees had exhausted their budget on  the A-list cast, who included Michael Gough, Laurence Naismith, Siân Phillips, Patricia Lawrence, Nicholas Courtney & Robert Addie.
Barriers was broadcast as 2 series in 1981-1982

Survivors (BBC 1) 1975-1977

Survivors
(BBC 1, 1975-1977)

I guess this series is almost forgotten, it hit our screens when I was at the tender age of 8, so I didn't get to see the episodes first time round. I did check them out on cable in the 90's and was blown out with this apocalyptic tale of survival in a post plague world (...well England anyway!).
It all starts ...as the opening credits show, with a Chinaman dropping a test tube (presumably holding the deadly plague) and then dropping dead at an airport after we are shown a bunch of immigration stamps for major world cities, finishing with London on September 23rd!
After this we are introduced to our main players one by one, Abby Grant (posh, bossy, 70's woman), Jenny Richards (powdered fanny, needy type), Greg Preston (Pilot and alpha male) and Tom Price (bum & dirty old man...on screen and off apparently!). We are shown each survivor's story from the moment the plague takes hold, and the rapid realization that they must find help.
After a couple of episodes, the four leads end up relying on each other to survive and eventually set up a commune in a large house, Greg and Jenny by now having started a relationship. Others join week by week, including 2 very annoying kids (who never die...even though you REALLY want them to!), a half wit called Barney, a sexy girl called Wendy and her VERY irritating foreign mother figure, Emma Cohen, a grumpy cripple called Vic Thatcher, a wandering hippy, Tom Price and finally a posh bloke Arthur Russell and his secretary Charmian. The first series was written by Terry Nation (of  'Blake 7' fame) and his skills really shine through during these first gripping 13 installments. The characters are also very likeable and easy to warm to, which is why it is distressing when some have to die. One of the most powerful episodes is 'Law and Order' in which Tom rapes and murders Wendy after a drunken party, but Barney is the chief suspect and is shot by Greg after a trial. Tom is exposed by Abby, but Greg decides to keep it quiet from the others. 'Gone To The Angels' is another moving episode. When Abby goes to see three holy men on a mountain in a search for some meaning, all contract the killer virus from her and die. This is a strange installment as it deals with the religious side of the disaster and leaves Abby and the viewer feeling empty and hopeless!

The trial from Law and Order.

Other stand out episodes of this series include the distracting 'Garlands War', in which Abby finds love with the hansome aristocratic warrior Jimmy Garland, 'Revenge' where the interesting, but under explored character, Vic Thatcher meets up with his posh girlfriend Anne, after she left him for dead in episode 2, and 'A Beginning' which ends the series with the introduction of Ruth Anderson (a key player in series 2), and the possibility of trade between the local communities.
The only disappointment with the conclusion of series one, is the failure of the sinister 'Government Forces' to attack or even materialize, after continued warnings of their encroaching presence in the area since episode 3! (This could be explained by the departure of Terry Nation as writer at the end of the first series).
Series two, starts with a real shock for regular viewers, as half of the cast are culled in a fire which destroys the house. Sadly, Vic Thatcher, and not so sadly, Charmian, Donny, Emma and Laura (plus baby) perish. The survivors now end up staying with Charles Vaughan (who played a kind of David Koresh type in an early episode). Charles is now given a more stable setting with his new partner, Pet, and the new community is led by Greg as engineer, and Charles as farmer. Abby is sadly not present in this series her absence is explained by her long drawn out (and tiresome) search for her son (in reality, Carolyn Seymour who played the part, left the series due to an out of control cocaine habit!).
The second series lacks the punch of the first and it feels like a post plague Emmerdale Farm. The new characters, Ruth, Charles, Jack and Hubert take up the slack, but the absence of Abby is a great void in the remainder of the series. Sad losses during this series include regulars, Arthur Russell and Paul Pitman, who both succumb to disease. Other highlights include a 2 part episode 'The Lights of London', where Dr Ruth is tricked into journeying into the rat infested capital to help the 500 inhabitants overcome a deadly virus. 'New Arrivals' see's Charles's authority challenged by a new kid on the block and 'Parasites' deals with a couple of criminals arriving by barge to upset the peace!
The series ends with Greg taking off in a balloon going to Norway to find ways of harnessing electricity. This is another blow for the viewer as Greg has been a foundation stone throughout the series, and although he does return in the next series it is only for a couple of adventures, before he eventually dies of smallpox in 'The Last Laugh'.
Series three seems to loose all cohesion with the community spirit that had characterized the previous series and feels more like a bunch of isolated quests, which lead up to the final episode, where Charles, Hubert and Jenny head to Scotland to switch on a generator which will bring power and industry to England again!
In all, the series is very intelligently written, and although the main characters are all middle class (and the dodgy, dishonest, stupid and criminal, are all working class!), there is a reality about this future, and that is that the class system will still exist even when humanity is almost extinct. This vision persists throughout the series, but that doesn't detract from the overall feel as the plots are at worst, mildly entertaining, but at best gripping and thought provoking.
A 2008 remake of the series did not hit the mark with the public, but the original is still worth getting hold of, and locking yourself away all weekend to watch!

Abby & Greg

  Series One

1. The Fourth Horseman *****
2. Genesis ****
3. Gone Away *****
4. Corn Dolly ****
5. Gone to the Angels ****
6. Garland's War ****
7. Starvation ***
8. Spoil of War ****
9. Law and Order *****
10. The Future Hour ***
11. Revenge *****
12. Something of Value ****
13. A Beginning *****

 
  Series Two

1. Birth of A Hope ****
2. Greater Love *****
3. Lights of London Part 1 ****
4. Lights of London Part 2 *****
5. Face of the Tiger ***
6. The Witch ***
7. A Friend In Need ***
8. By Bread Alone ***
9. The Chosen ****
10. Parasites *****
11. New Arrivals ***
12. Over The Hills
13. New World ***

     
Series Three

1. Manhunt ***
2. A Little Learning ***
3. Law of the Jungle ***
4. Mad Dog ****
5. Bridgehead ***
6. Reunion ****
7. The Peacemaker ***
8. Sparks ***
9. The Enemy ***
10. The Last Laugh ****
11. Long Live The King ****
12. Power  ***

**        A bit boring
***      Average
****     Good
*****    Exellent

Cast Members

• Abby Grant (Carolyn Seymour)  (13 episodes, 1975)
• Greg Preston  (Ian McCulloch)  (26 episodes, 1975-1977) **
• Jenny Richards (Lucy Fleming)  (32 episodes, 1975-1977)
• Tom Price (Talfryn Thomas)  (7 episodes, 1975) **
• Arthur Wormley (George Baker)    (1 episode, 1975)
• Vic Thatcher (Terry Scully / Hugh Walters / Terry Denton)  (7 episodes, 1975) *
• Anne Tranter (Myra Frances) (2 episodes, 1975)
• Charles Vaughan (Denis Lill)  (24 episodes, 1975-1977)
• Emma Cohen (Hana Maria Pravda)  (7 episodes, 1975) *
• Wendy (Julie Neubert)  (3 episodes, 1975) **
• Barney (John Hallet) (3 episodes, 1975) **
• Paul Pitman (Chris Tranchell)  (8 episodes, 1975-1976) **
• Arthur Russell (Michael Gover)   (12 episodes, 1975-1976) **
• Charmian Wentworth (Eileen Helsby)  (6 episodes, 1975) *
• Jimmy Garland   (Richard Heffer)  (2 episodes, 1975)
• John Millon (Stephen Dudley)  (22 episodes, 1975-1977)
• Lizzie Willoughby (Tanya Ronder / Angie Stevens)  (19 episodes, 1975-1977)
• Sam Mead  (Robert Gillespie)  (4 episodes, 1975-1977) **
• Donny  (Robert Tayman)  (1 episode, 1975) *
• Ruth Anderson  (Annie Irving / Celia Gregory) (12 episodes, 1975-1976)
• Pet Simpson (Lorna Lewis)  (15 episodes, 1976-1977)
• Hubert Goss  (John Abineri) (17 episodes, 1976-1977)
• Jack Wood  (Gordon Salkilld)  (9 episodes, 1976-1977)
• Alan  (Stephen Tate) (4 episodes, 1976)
• Mina  (Delia Paton)  (2 episodes, 1976)
• Lewis Fearn  (Roy Herrick)  (2 episodes, 1976) **
• Agnes Carlsson  (Anna Pitt) (5 episodes, 1977)
• Alec Campbell  (William Dysart)  (4 episodes, 1977)
• Frank Garner (Edward Underdown)  (3 episodes, 1977) **

*   Died in the fire in 'Birth of a Hope' Series 2, Episode 1
** Murdered or died horribly in Series 1
** Murdered or died horribly in Series 2 or 3